SHOWING UP FULLY FOR MYSELF

 

AM I SHOWING UP FOR MYSELF?

WELLLLLLL…….After writing the last blog post…. I was in for a rude awakening when I sprained my ankle.

My last post was about racing in 2025 and I was going to do a half marathon in Richmond after having the flu. Not so fast.  I am sidelined from running.

First: the sprain. I’ve sprained that ankle previously (in 1994, so 31 years ago!) and also broke 2 bones in that foot in that incident.  I had a cast on (this was my first year at uva, so it was highly memorable crutching around campus because I of course, being me, refused to take the bus). Anyway, I have had no foot problems in the time since, thankfully.  I think of my ankles and feet honestly as unbelievably strong.  Next time you watch any gymnastics on TV, watch the close ups of the gymnasts feet on the balance beam.  Those toes are like GRIPPERS. Anyway, long story short, I was training someone, doing high single leg jumps with them and, I must have been distracted or I have no idea, I literally came down AT 90 degrees on my ankle. I heard it.  I thought it was broken. I was frozen in shock and wanted to puke and also essentially was still working… ha… so I quickly ended that session- it was just 5 minutes to go, dragged myself to my freezer for ice and still had my eyes bugging out of me thinking, can I Just go back and NOT DO THAT??!!!

So, I cannot backtrack.  I cannot run for approx. 4 weeks apparently. And so I’m highly bummed about that.  I’m bummed because I love it, because I have plans, because I Had spent January and February until I got the flu really training myself solid and getting into a fitness level that I was proud to be consistently working at. AND, I know I’ll lose my run fitness. HOWEVER…. Within 24 hours, I thankfully, was able to adjust my mindset to an athlete’s mindset that I try to follow when I am coaching people who are injured or at a setback.  It is disappointing, but you can ALWAYS LOOK TO THE OPPORTUNITY.  So, I made myself do the same thing.  What is the opportunity here, Sharon? How can I continue to FULLY SHOW UP day to day for myself.

And: there is an opportunity.  There are MANY.

There is an opportunity to train much harder and more consistently on the bike.  I don’t have to “share” my training time with running right now, so I can really get in some good hours on the bike. I can do an “experiment” in what it is like training harder on the bike than on the run.

There is an opportunity for strength and more core and more other things that I love (handstands and yoga).

And this is a chance to practice handling hard things. (I mean, there is frankly enough hard things going on in the world and my life already at the moment and I don’t really need this addition, but here it is, so… I will learn from this). I will practice being resilient with my mindset, not giving up, but just taking a pivot and side road to get to the same destination.  I am seeing the positives- OH MY GOODNESS I realize how lucky I am: so lucky this did not happen in the summer, lucky it wasn’t closer to my marathon in Kauai, lucky it didn’t happen when I was hiking by myself on a mountain in Kauai! GOSH, I do feel thankful for those things AS WELL AS EVEN MORE INSPIRED to do all the rehab- all the things in my power to make sure that I have done my work in strengthening these ligaments that are now more susceptible to a future sprain and ankle roll. So, I’m on it.  I’m fired up. Last blog post, I wrote from this place of calm contentment in my training and outcomes.  I am now fiercely and furiously motivated to attack my days with all the things possible that I can do to get back on track, in the short term and in the long term. I feel almost like I am being reminded of who I am in my core, my essence, the days of Sharon the one who will rise to strength and not let disappointments be the end of my story.

I’m excited and interested to see where this takes me.

For now, I’ll be on my bike, in the pool with a pull buoy, and staying strong, SHOWING UP FULLY FOR MYSELF.

RACING INTO 2025

 

RACING INTO 2025.

Well, here I am, 2 months into 2025.

I have a race scheduled for next weekend- one I’ve been really excited for- the Richmond ½. I’ve never done it before, I love Richmond, I love doing new races, I love having a REASON to be on my treadmill for long distances in the winter. And I have done that WEEKLY. I’ve been proud of my weekly commitment to my training plan and listening to my body, pushing myself, being fully consistent.  I’m not exactly where I want to be, but I’ve been working hard.

I also have been sick the past near 2 weeks. Not sure what it started with, but it hammered me again 4 days ago and I tested positive for flu b. And I’m at this point not pushing a single thing. I just want to honor the sickness and heal well.

That leaves me unsure of next weekend.

Goals, purposes, intentions obviously are changed. And that is ok. As long as it is healthy, I am honestly completely aware of my need to listen to my body and do the very right thing.  So, that means, I have to open my mind to the possibility of going to this event and maybe literally just jogging my way through 13.1 miles.  Even doing that might in all honesty be quite a success. 6 days away and today I’m not even going to jog a mile because I know my lungs are not ready though, so there is also the possibility that I may not be able to healthily go and do this thing. Which is also something I need to begin settling in my head and heart.  I don’t like one bit signing up for a race that I don’t do.  (I’ve unfortunately done this previously and not loved it. Those are different stories- but there was a reston triathlon that I signed up for, drove to the parking lot and it was pouring and I Just thought, this is not my idea of fun and I WENT BACK HOME! I’ll never forget that! Also there was a wine country half marathon that was pouring rain and I decided to skip because it was just going to be a drenched mud slog and again, I just don’t regret missing those 2 events!)

So, I had begun my year training strong, have had a health setback, and now I am preparing to pivot into an unknown week of just being open to finding what is right for me. I of course am not someone who loves not sticking with a plan, not KNOWING what is coming up, and also not being able to plan day by day as I am kind of just listening to how I feel right now. It is life and overall, I’m lucky to have this setback now rather than in the summer.  (please I am praying so fervently to not be sick during summer or before my aug/sept travel!)

So, this only brings me to what I need to keep my feet on: what are the things I can control right now. And those are:

*WRITING THIS: it helps me make sense of things and be measured and to sort things out in my head and heart.

*EATING HEALTHY, DRINKING LOTS OF FLUIDS, RESTING, CALMING MY NERVOUS SYSTEM, doing anything I can for immunity.

*GETTING OTHER THINGS DONE NOW.  I am not spending hours on my feet right now, so I can spend some of that time getting other things done that I don’t want to when it is summer and I’m in top mode fitness function.

 

So those things will get me through this initial beginning of March frustration with having been sick and I know I need to look FURTHER FORWARD now.

BIG GOAL OF THE YEAR RACING WISE IS: to stay fit and healthy through the summer so that I can run the Kauai marathon at the end of August.

I am registered for ½ IM (70.3) in PA which is a NEW TO ME race (in mid June) and I’m intrigued by it and excited to have it on the calender. It is a hilly bike and run.  I have no goals of being fast in this race, my goal is to train to complete it well. Obviously it is going to be hard, I know I won’t “feel well” through the whole thing, but I want to be strong enough to grit through it and be stronger because I trained consistently and hard through the next 3 months (starting asap after this health setback) and also the race itself is always another notch in fitness.  You will always be stronger after completing a race.

So then I will have 10 weeks until marathon to take a step back week and recover from 70.3 and then carry on with my long runs, swim/strength/cycling.

I don’t know if I’ll be able to do 2 of my favorite races (Luray Tri as well as Annapolis 10 Miler) because I don’t know yet when my kids will be moving into college this fall and we will have 2 of those move in times, so that is just off the radar for now.

I love doing Wine Country 1/2  which is 5/31, however I am not yet registered and have this hesitation because it is around the time of graduation, end of school year, so much with schedules and I know I’ll be also trying to get long bike rides in. So, that “filler, fun run” is being considered, as well as Culpeper Tri which was just one of my FAVORITE DAYS of last years summer! I’ll see how things are going, I just don’t want to over-reach and in any way jeopardize my ability to run in Kauai.

Now, I want to cycle back to the interesting thing about this years races. It is not escaping me that I just don’t have this huge urge to “perform”. Like I want to BE FIT.  I want to get out and do hard things and struggle and do my best in training each day of my plan so that I am in the best possible shape on race day.  However, for example, in Kauai- I do not intend to blast my body. (a marathon will be enough of a blast). I’d like to run without walking, HOWEVER, I am completely open to the possibility of walking and pausing and reveling in my surroundings.  And that seems to be really my thought for the 70.3PA race also- I want to have no doubts that I did my work in preparation and I want to work hard on race day, but more importantly, safely and smart. I just find it interesting that there really isn’t even a percentage of me that thinks “RACE MINDSET”. I feel happy to be engaging in the sports I enjoy, mostly so that each week, I get to get out for my intensity run intervals that I like to do, some hill repeats, some easy and aerobic fun times, my long workouts on the weekends. I’m proud of myself to not be scared to be slower than I ever have been. I feel as if my mental standpoint is at a place of “intensity in the training and build- get gritty in the day to day, so that I can revel in the feeling of fitness and awe at my events”!

As always, writing this was helpful to myself, to iron out some thoughts along the way. I think it may not be the most organized writing, but it sure did organize what are my benchmarks of fun for the year!