Monday, June 6, 2022

EAGLEMAN 2022- 6 days to go



Eagleman ½ Ironman is one week from today.  I write this Sunday night- in one week, Eagleman will be done!  I’m taking time to mentally prep, and it has always helped me to go back and read over some of my past race reports.  Well, my last Eagleman was 2018 and…. It was my only Eagleman DNF.  If you are interested, you can read that race report at this link:


So, I’ve taken off 4 years from ½ Ironman distance.  And it has been a GOOD THING.  Covid- basically took 2 years also off from triathlons! Also—in all honesty, a good thing.

I did a marathon in March to get back into a goal, a challenge, and I LOVED IT.  Then, I began getting on my bike a lot more, and once/week committed to getting into the pool after the marathon, and it was SO FUN!  It all felt new again, and I was HAPPY to be doing these things.  Swimming, biking and running were bringing me JOY and a sense of playfulness and I LOVED how I was feeling.  I think the marathon was helpful to get me back into this “long” way of thinking- like being out there for a LONG time and suffering, so when I began getting on my bike for 2+ hours, it wasn’t too bad since I was coming from doing long hours of work.

So, that being said.  I’m NERVOUS.

I’ve had some great workouts.  I’ve had some (yesterday) where I have felt like utter crap.  Heavy. Barely moving.  Grunting. Lately- for about 2 weeks kind of a mental issue of these bad head games and anxiety and irritability of worrying.  This is my reminder of my tendency.  My tendency is to get into a workout or race, and think of the end result.  I want to finish the plan. I want to finish with my goals.  So, I keep thinking about my goals.  And not just think on them, but OVERTHINK, and FIXATE, and TIRE MYSELF needlessly with mental annoyance.

I am realizing that in the next 6 days, it is the mental game I must prepare for.

I am ready physically.

Mentally, I must prepare my mindset.  I must prepare to SUFFER FULLY, however not fixate on the suffering.  I’ve noticed, and it is fine- but when I am out there literally at like a 9.5/10 on a training session, if I’m on a path or road all by myself and at this 9.5/10 effort level, I grunt and make a noise or say some choice words.  That is fine to do.  However, what I take from that and my RESPONSE will be the result. If I hear myself grunting and start telling myself a story of how bad I am suffering, I will be leading the way to places that aren’t productive.  If I do that same grunt and let myself know that I am taking this difficult place and the grunt was my “fight” and will and commitment to STAY, that is a different result of my race.

I have a tendency to when I feel terrible, think that I need to escape it, that I need to solve it and fix it and have a plan to get out of it and make it better.  Instead, I need to calm down.  Calm down and go with it, through it.  This is how it is at Eagleman, it is only THROUGH the shit moments that you finish.  Each race always has a lifetime of stories of how it comes to be that you survive… at least it feels that way.  And that is part of the huge draw and lure of doing it.  How do you find something within that you didn’t know if you actually had?  The only way to find that is by not escaping, not forcing the bad stuff away, because that just means giving in, walking, quitting.


The essence of a race is get out there and “get it done.”  However, again, this mindset of too much focusing on the finish will be counterproductive.  I have to be in it for the PROCESS and JOURNEY.  It is not about a time, a finishing place, but if I can look back and know that I dug into the deepest fibers of my being, learned about myself, got all of the elements of myself to work together to eek out the strongest physical and psychological performance I could on this day, then it was worth it.  I will commit to being open to the process, the long haul, and all in for the entirety of the race.

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