Shamrock Marathon 2022

 

SHAMROCK MARATHON 2022- as a disclaimer, this is long.  I enjoy writing this up as a mental wrap up so that I remember things, learn for the future, and it is always helpful to come back later and be reminded of different feelings, how I pushed through, what my paces were, etc.  You are under No obligation to read this entire thing!!

I believe this was my 10^th marathon!  (not including the one in Ironman Lake Placid/2003)(speaking of, HOW DID I do a marathon at the end of all of that?!! Ahhh perspective…. That is for another day).

I am very happy with this marathon.  I wasn’t sure what I was going to train for this spring, was looking for maybe a warm place to go, but with uncertainty, I decided to stay closer to home, and heck Virginia Beach is still at the ocean, even if it isn’t warm in March, right?!

I committed to begin training the last week in December/ January 1^st.  I had already been doing runs of 7-11 miles, so it was a quick ramp up to 13 and then I began creeping up my long runs right away in January.  January and February proved to be ridiculous cold months. I had 4-5 long runs where it was teens or 20 degree weather, and I actually found that wearing a mask was magnificently helpful in being able to stand being outside for these hours of running.  *one positive from covid!  There were LOTS of treadmill runs overall, BUT- those long ones I just couldn’t commit to being on the treadmill for 2:30-3 hours this winter.

Overall, I committed to the plan I created for myself, increasing long runs, adding in intervals within long runs, adding intensity in various lengths for at least 1 run during the week, averaging between 40-50 miles/week during my build up (which was around 10 weeks- short for marathon).

RACE DAY:

Well, actually, night before.  I slept none.  NONE. N.O.N.E.  It was ridiculous. I was nervous.  I’ve had a few months of weird nighttime anxiety- usually for no reason at all, this time I guess there was at least a reason.  Also, the road outside my hotel had ridiculous crazy cars screeching, needing mufflers, etc.  It was stupid insane, but there was nothing I could do.

I got up, rolled, prepped my flasks of water and liquid IV, had a few bites of banana and coffee for sure.  Off to start line.  Interesting fact was how odd the set up was, in my opinion.  I was actually standing on the WRONG AREA thinking the start line would be forming from where I was, but instead it was one street away!  So, when I went to do my jog warm up, I was like Oh my GOOOSHHH here are all the people!  Duh.

The worst part is waiting, I was so glad when it started.  So, after running in Reston, this was like joyous to BEGIN A RUN ON FLAT TERRAIN! SO SO SO SO NICE and steady!  HOWEVER, in my first mile, my breathing was still normalizing and I was like, is this appropriate, is this too much, but it seemed moderate pace and body relaxed until my breathing normalized.  First 3 miles my pace was almost too good, so I kept telling myself, maybe relax more and ease off and trying to slightly--- as if I was turning the treadmill numbers down like .2-.3.  My pace still hovered around the same.  Mile 4 and 5 felt like there was a little incline- it looked this way at least, but I didn’t really FEEL it and my pace continued steady at around 7:30-7:40.  This pace was faster than what I intended, but again- having not run on FLATS like this… ummmm…. Maybe ever??  I knew my intensity was okay and where I wanted it, so trusted to just settle into this and stop second guessing myself.

Mile 5-10- we went through Fort Story and it continued to be flat and I felt like I was holding a nice, relaxed but strong groove.  It was so cool to once in awhile have a path to the side where you could see that there were sand dunes leading to the OCEAN!

Mile 10 I began to definitely notice my legs were working hard- my breathing and heart rate were absolutely still just easily sailing fine.  However, I could tell this was some effort being done in legs here, which made me a little bit nervous and question my pace.  But:  overall, I felt comfortable that I was in a range that was right for me and was trying to get myself from mile 10-12 to stop questioning myself.  My legs were feeling it, but I wasn’t sure if it would progress to being problematic, or just hold at this feeling.  I was aware of just calmly managing a bit of discomfort here.  I tried to notice it, but then not pay it more attention than it needed. 

Mile 12 was first sign of distress.  Ughh. Had to go to the bathroom.  Thankfully, I knew there was one coming- they had them every 2 miles, so at least there was that positive.  I ran in, was as quick as could be and prayed that was the end of my problems.  That morning, I had what felt like a very smooth and not irritable stomach, so I had been very hopeful.  This was my first indication that maybe things weren’t as happy as I had wanted them to be.

Once I went to the bathroom, I was able to get back into a decent run groove, now maintaining 8 min mile pace for the next 3 miles.  (12-15).  This began to be a definite EFFORT – the 1/2 marathoners had cut off for the finish line, which I kind of liked- as it was less people distracting me as I knew and wondered which of these people around me were almost DONE. We began running on the boardwalk which was CONCRETE and OH MY GOSH MY LEGS were now officially KILLED.  It was nice being right next to the ocean, I kept letting myself glance out at the beautiful water to calm myself and be so happy to be at the ocean, but I was very well aware that literally each step felt like it was building up pressure in my legs.  I had a mental “landmark” to get to mile 15, which would be when we veered off the boardwalk and it would then be an out and back with a little loop through a military camp from mile 15-22, so I was really just mentally aiming for 15 to both get off the concrete, but also to begin this out and back loop.   I was SO RELIEVED to get off the concrete boardwalk, however, I was struggling with needing to go to the bathroom again.  Luckily, I knew they were going to be available, so I was looking for it, ran into the next one and was quick (this mile was 9:12, so took me out of my 8 min pace, but it wasn’t an option to not stop). Mile 15- immediately out of the bathroom, I was passing people who had been behind me, so it felt appropriate that I wasn’t getting fully back to where I was, but that I was “back in it.”  This whole time I was trying to eat 1 block or energy stinger every 1.5 miles.  I had finished my liquid IV and had 1 flask left with water.  LEGS were the biggest issue.  I was trying to take it 2 miles mentally at a time 15-17, 17-19, 19-21, 21-23, and then I’d be back at the ocean/homestretch (concrete!!!)…

Mile 15-17: I had 2 miles in my groove going out- passing the aquarium, low 8 min pace, again happy with being able to PUSH THIS while honestly I was now managing SUFFERING, no more managing discomfort, this started to become PAIN.  Mile 17-19- this was still out and back and I tried to just be calm and let the time pass while holding my cadence and focus and stay strong and steady through some hill sections.  Then, INSANE.  Mile 19. Again. Had to go to the bathroom. I had no idea if I may not be able to make it to the finish- it was like why do I have to go again?????  I thought this could take me out of the race if it kept coming each mile?  LUCKILY, I didn’t know this then, but this was my last stop!  I don’t know how or why it stopped, but thank goodness.  It was just irritating and distracting to keep having this problem.

Starting at mile 20, I knew my “race” was starting.  During the 15-20 miles, I had thought, HANG ON TO THE EFFORT UNTIL 20 and if you keep this pace, you are “safe” and can back off and still be okay getting a decent finish time and maybe qualifying for Boston.  I knew mile by mile, I was getting there to this safe place.  HOWEVER, through these series of 5 miles, I had been (along with sightseeing the ocean and taking bathroom stops) I had begun to have an internal conversation about – WHY?  Why was I making up this story that I had to die at mile 20 and just scrape through to the end?  I had just gone through all of this mental prep in the weeks leading to my race to believe in myself, to be calm and run with courage, to set myself up for a solid run by not being scared at the beginning, trusting my fitness and training to go strong and not hold back.  Why was this any different?  I realized I had created this whole script that I was planning to not be able to finish strong.  I wasn’t trusting myself at the exact time that I realized I have a hard time trusting myself- at the end.  I know some people have trouble starting strong- they are too afraid it will blow them up, but that is not my “fear.”  My fear is the terrible end times and not being able to have anything left, so I kind of plan to not have anything left. Hmmmm….  So, I had decided during these miles that if I was going to be preaching my little “trust” mantra, that I had best pony up and stop telling myself this story that I couldn’t also maintain my focus for a strong finish. I decided to not let up on myself once I hit 20, and to keep fighting with each step.

We were weaving through these back roads with military camp style housing it seemed like, and it was very sparse/ no crowds at all, the runners were pretty spread here.  Mile 21 just seemed lonely, I definitely had a few audible grunts during this time, reminding myself to stay awake, be in the suffer, commit to what I had started. I started to see people walking, but kept my effort level.  And I say that not as if I was plugging along like at the beginning, but I was now literally STEP BY STEP trying to not stop.  My legs had HAD it.  I passed a water stop where I guy said, you are running so smooth, and that was a nice word that I tried to keep my running really smooth and efficient, like I was trying to look the part even if I didn’t FEEL smooth.  I kept that for about a mile as a mental focus. Next mile ticked off, I’m at 22, Now I decide, if I can make it to mile 23, I am going to let myself walk for .1 of a mile, before final 3 mile push to end. 

We had to go back on the main street, I am seeing people that are just beginning their out and back loop and I am always so thankful to be on the way back when I see people going in the other direction.  I always feel like- it is so much “easier” relatively to be a little bit on the faster side because you are just simply on your legs for less.  So, I used that as a little bit of a motivation to try to get through.  I got to 22.75 and was trying to make it to 23 to walk and honestly… I think my calf was SCREAMING at me.  I literally thought it may explode with another step, and began my .1 walk at that point.  I was on target and didn’t go past my .1, forced myself to begin again, as there is no sense in prolonging the race by farting around walking too long.  Back to run.  I was making it. 

Made it to the boardwalk, nice cool breeze at the ocean, the water is so beautiful.  Everything is short here.  It isn’t mile by mile, it is step by step.  Again, the concreate literally was just crushing my legs with each step, but I just knew, there was a turn off to go back through the town before the finish line, so I had 2 miles of concrete to just suck it up and shut up about thinking about it.  There is no way around it, just through it, so get it done. Once we turned off, I had another walk of .05- I measured it because I honestly won’t let myself use it too long and just force it back, the clock tells me to go back to run and I do.  I knew this was the end.  A little over a mile.  I am trying to do some math, I know for sure I’m going to qualify for Boston, but qualifying for NYC was in the mix earlier and I don’t think with how I’ve slowed down and had bathroom stops and 2 short walks it will happen… but, I am also not doing my best math in my head right now- there isn’t energy enough to do any math now, so I just go as much as I can.  I realize the turn around to get back to the finish line is a few blocks further down than where I thought, shit.  So that was frustrating because I am holding on by a thread now. Running block to block.  Finally, we get to turn, I see the ocean, backtrack along the boardwalk again to the finish line.  I can see the white flags where the finish is- I was trying to run with anything I had left, even if it was minimal to just get there.  GET. FREAKING. THERE.  There were ½ marathoners finishing on the left- mostly walking.  It was helpful that they had it sectioned off for marathoners on one side/ half on the other because if I had to weave in between people at this point, I would not have been a happy camper.  I finished strong, crossed, walked, and made my way down to the sand.

SPLITS:

1.       7:35

2.        7:45

3.        7:50

4.       7:34

5.       7:33

6.       7:30

7.       7:38

8.       7:41

9.       7:50

10.   7:45       

11.   7:49

12.   8:36

13.   8:01

14.   8:03

15.   8:10

16.   9:12

17.   8:11

18.   8:30

19.   9:20

20.   8:39

21.   9:04

22.   8:55

23.   9:56

24.   9:45

25.   10:03

26.   9:21

27.   Finish .2: 8:52

Overall:  3:41:09

What I learned/ was reminded of:

*last 10K of marathon isn’t just “one mile at a time”…. It is like ¼ mile at a time, 1 step at a time, 1 block at a time, it is just having a FIERCE COMMITMENT to STAYING IN THE PAIN.

*don’t take alleve before race next time.  I’m wondering if that was a component of my bad GI issues which were actually worse AFTER the race than during.

*I am happy how I went through my goals very SPECIFICALLY before the race- if my goal was X time, I wanted to “save” a little bit at end, so didn’t want to waste time first 15 miles.  I’m very glad I did this, I ended up executing the plan, whereas if I hadn’t set myself up for it, I don’t know if it would have happened.

*glad I had throwaway clothes for the beginning of the race, it wasn’t cold, but it was nice to have a sweatshirt that just kept me extra warm before the start.

*I am so thankful that I could get a late checkout- I cannot imagine not being able to get a shower and have a few minutes to get my things together after the race.

WHEW…. Glad I did this race. I would definitely do again.

TRUST

 

TRUST.

This week, I offered an intention to focus on TRUST during yoga.

This word, this mindful return to the solid, silent strength within us is so important.  It is so easy to lose sight of our inner knowledge and intuition.  I see it in myself.  I see it in others.

We are whizzing and whirling around in this world and sometimes have lost touch with trusting our SELVES.  Our body, our heart, our instincts.  We google what we should do instead of look within.  (We includes me).  We ask others within our circle what we should do (I’m not saying this is bad), when we really know within ourselves what is right for us. When we pause to really be truthful with ourselves, we already know what to do, how we think, our most basic answers within.

This is one of my favorite things of yoga practice- learning to trust ourselves- to not NEED to move a certain way, but to move in a way that is OURS.  To make it OUR bodies art, our arm lift, OUR stretch, our exhale, OUR pace. We trust our breath to be our energy, each breath to be as it is.  We trust our arms to rise on an inhale- maybe bent, straight, V shaped, U shaped, halfway up, bound at the top.  No need to make stories about how we lift our arms, it is our trust that it is right for us.  It is so simple, but for many, so novel and life changing.

I will be asking myself this weekend to “trust” myself in my marathon.  This is (I’m pretty sure) my 10^th.  But it has been over 25 years – my first was in 1997.  My focus has shifted from marathons to triathlons, triathlons of various distances, back to marathons, then to injury prevention, then triathlon, then covid, and… here I am with a marathon, and it feels new again.

Those of you who know me well, know I struggle with my …… head.  I often work against myself.  My tendency is to doubt and not be confident.  But, I know the importance of eliminating fear and anxiety by resting in trust.  If our fear is overwhelming us, we aren’t in a place of trust.

I am reminding myself that I trust my training.

I trust my ability to be calm and settled.

I trust myself to lean on my training that has been all that it has needed to be, I have done all the work of preparing as I have asked myself.  I am ready, despite some flutterings of unsettled feelings inside. I trust the process that I’ve taken myself through.

I trust my ability to remain in trust through the hard times.  Each mile, when it gets hard, I don’t doubt that I can make it through.  One mile at a time if needed.  I do trust this.  Trust is this subtle heart sense, but also a firm foundation of solid strength in trust.  If you trust, you don’t need to ask any questions.  I know I can rely on myself.

I am not saying the marathon is simply a matter of trust- there is a lot that can happen on race day.  Sometimes, the legs don’t arrive feeling good or “on”, or it is just a harder day.  It is not as if you reach your goals merely on a whim of “trusting yourself.”  However, that sure is part of the process.  Your physical training can take you to a certain level, and then it needs to be matched with believing in yourself, believing in your ability to take a chance on yourself, to risk the goal you are aiming for.  To risk trusting the character that you are made of, the strength within to rally, rise and not give up on yourself.

We need to trust ourselves to do big things.

It Doesn't Matter What it LOOKS Like.....

 

Oh my gosh you guys, one of my FAVORITE reminders.

“It doesn’t matter what it LOOKS like, it matters what it FEELS like.”

I usually say this in yoga.  It is so true and we all need to hear it.  (You all know I cue things sometimes during classes because it is a reminder I NEED, so I share it because that means there are probably at least half the people in class can use it also, right!!)  In yoga practice, for example, how often have you thought that you aren’t flexible “enough”, or that your position should LOOK like something you have seen or something in your mind that you wish you could make it look like?  Or maybe you even think that before you began yoga- that you needed to look a certain way as a human body to even do yoga!  This is too much thinking, and we need to take ourselves, over and over, out of this way of thinking.

In a stretch, let’s say downdog:  maybe you see someone else can get their heels to touch the floor and maybe yours are so high that you just cannot get them close to the floor.  THAT IS OK!  It is maybe NEVER GONNA HAPPEN!  Our BONE SHAPES are different!  My downdog should never look like your down dog because we don’t even know the shapes of the bones in our body.  Are you doing the position, and you FEEL the stretch?  Then it is right for you!  It does not need to LOOK a certain way! Look at how different people’s backs bend differently.  It is not as if most of us could work on back flexibility and be hired for Cirque de Soleil.  These artists have genetics that allow them to bend this way (as well as do loads of work and training as well- I don’t intend to diminish that).  My point is:  it doesn’t matter what your stretch LOOKS LIKE, it matters if you feel the purpose of the position.

And so it begins- yoga being this script for so many things in life.  It rarely matters what things LOOK LIKE, right?  What does it FEEL like- is it your current place, your truth, are you in your effort now?     Then it is as it should be.

I was reminded of this last weekend on a long run.  I passed by someone I knew who was doing their long run and they said it FELT HORRIBLE.  I knew she was supposed to be holding a pace or intensity for a number of miles.  I didn’t have time within the passing, but I kept thinking, shoot, I hope she knows, “it doesn’t matter what it looks like, it matters what it feels like.”  In running- if as an example she was supposed to be holding 8:30 pace, but the headwinds were over the top for some of those miles- it is not what the garmin split or your watch says you held number wise (what it “looks like”), but were you working at the intensity that was the purpose, and was it the effort of how it should have FELT!  Are we IN THE WORK?!  Are we awake in our bodies, at the right place!  Are we feeling what is right for us to feel.

This could be in so many things:  it could be doing a crunch on the floor.  Maybe you don’t lift up as high as someone else.  WHO CARES!  It doesn’t matter what it LOOKS LIKE!  Once again- our spines are different, our body lengths are different, our flexibility and strengths are all different!  The question is always, DO YOU FEEL what you are supposed to be feeling?  Do you feel your muscle shortening and working?!  Are you exhaling with the work and aware of the sensations as deeply as possible for YOU? That is all!  Nothing needs to LOOK a certain way!

Body shapes:  we are all different. (Ok, you all know this is a lifetime learning process for me.  I’m still at it, so many of us are).  But: I could starve myself silly and I would just not look like some body that is wispy, long bone, and slight. (I mean, have you seen my freaking rib cage.  I have some big bones, people).  I used to show up at races thinking, “I don’t look like a runner” and doubted myself.  Then one year I saw  a girl who was short like me, compact with muscles, who WON!  I am reminded over and over again, it isn’t what you LOOK LIKE- it is what you have energy to train for, what does your body feel like- do you have energy, do you have motivation, drive and are you fueled up and fired up?!!!  It doesn’t matter what it looks like, it matters what it feels like.

It's one of my favorite things about anything in “group” settings- group workouts, races, etc.  We can all be at so many levels- different paces, losing our balance, trying again.  Things look different from one person to the next.  But, it doesn’t even matter- oftentimes, we are ALL WORKING THE SAME!  We are all in our places of effort, it just LOOKS different on different people!  It’s kinda beautiful. 

MARATHON TRAINING 2022

 

Marathon training 2022

I am 3 weeks out from Shamrock Marathon- my first marathon since Big Sur in 2019 (which was my first back since Boston in 2013!)  It’s been an interesting few months getting back into marathon training.  I posted earlier about some challenging runs I have had.  I’ve also had some successful long runs and also important workouts to support these long runs.  It’s been a LOT of up an down.  2 weeks ago, I got so fatigued, I had 3 days in a row where I quit my runs.  It was like I couldn’t even run anymore.  I was tired, both physically and mentally.  After 3 days of trying, I took OFF.  OFF OFF OFF.  I laid in bed for two days.  I don’t even know if I was maybe sick?  I sometimes think maybe I had covid and never knew?  But then again, I know this time of year is ALWAYS FREEEAAAAKING HARD for me.  And this year has been BAD.  NO SUN.  Freaking ridiculously cold temperatures where it is just HARD to get outdoors into the air.  So I am not sure if this was an energy drop because of marathon training/high mileage, life fatigue both physically and mentally, or allergies, or what, but HOPEFULLY I am back on a sustainable energy path!

Today, I went out for what was to be my longest run.  23 miles. My previous long run was 21.5.  That went WELL.  (well means hard, was at the LIMIT LIMIT LIMIT of physically being doable, but I did it which is “well” in marathon training).  I woke up today feeling great.  I had really prepped well this week with a week of backing off/ regaining my energy, a decrease in miles, focused and DID my hydration. (I did it GUYS!  I did it! Anything is possible, haha!)  I went to bed early last night, woke up feeling great.  I began my 23 miles with a definite focus on easing in for a few miles, and then just holding steady, balancing being relaxed, mentally being a bit bored/ reminding myself to not think about time, reminding myself to focus on form, smooth relaxed focus, etc.  Everything was going along VERY WELL- I was pleasantly surprised, up until 16 miles.  I began to feel my hip hurting.  Hmmm…. It was okay though.  Kept focus on form to make sure I wasn’t fatiguing and letting something go weird with footstrike, posture, etc.  Mile 18:  HIP HURTS.  KINDA A LOT.  Of course I always ask on a scale from 1/10.  AT this point, I was like, it is pretty bad, like 8.4/10 I thought.  I reminded myself that honestly, what would be worse, this hip pain or having DIARRHEA?!!!  HA!  I’d rather manage the hip pain at that point.  (honestly there is just nothing worse than needing to go to the bathroom and having no place to go).  I carried on.   Mile 19:  I’m at 9/10 pain.  I said, OK, muddle through 2 more miles as much as you can, when you get to 21, you can walk 1 min, then jog the rest of the mile, and do the same thing once more to the finish.  So, I have 2 more miles in my head, right?  (to get to where I get to walk a bit).  I am head down, muddling.  Have ZERO CARES for how bad this looks to anyone on the road passing me because I am not embarrassed, I am just 1000% managing pain.  Everything I have is just to keep steady form, step by step.  Mile 21, I make it and walk 1 min.  OHHH GOSH THIS IS SO UGLY.  I barely can walk.  I do knee to chest a few steps to try to stretch out glutes (excuse me, it is actually more like knee up 2 inches because that is all that I can manage).  My minute is up, I go to jog again, and it is NOT HAPPENING.  I am completely limping in my jog now.  I cannot land fully on my hip, it is a waddle/limp and I realize this is very bad for my back.  Of course my hip is the most pain, but I know the implications for future hip but also BACK and I know I am just doing damage.  I know I need to stop.  I walk it out.  I now cannot even walk.  My walk limp may even be worse than my run limp.   And I have 1.5 miles left to get home.  I have no phone.  I cannot even walk now, I’m standing on north shore and cannot walk so I grab a speed limit sign post and lean to stretch calves while I think.  OK, maybe that stopping fixed it?  (I know this is not logical, but how did I Just do all of that and now cannot walk, nothing makes sense.  This is also not my hamstring that typically gives me trouble, but the outside of my hip).  So, I try to walk.  Again, I cannot even take steps.  I am 1.5 miles still.  I honestly think of HOPPING home.  We do single leg hops and jumps in bootcamp, but I realize this is not feasible and I cannot hop on one leg for over a mile.  (Not even considering how embarrassing that would look).  I keep trying to walk and cannot do it.  I am crying now, thinking, PLEASE SOMEONE DRIVE BY THAT KNOWS ME and see that I am in huge need of help.  I kneel down.  Have no idea what to do, but also I know I cannot stand there all day, I have to pick up Forrest and his friend from practice.  I realize the back of the townhouses off of north shore back up to baron Cameron and if I can cut through somehow, that will at least take off some of the distance.  I HOBBLE through and finally see baron Cameron.  However, there is a big gully full of water at the bottom before it rises back up to the road. (snakes??!!) I see a bit down that it doesn’t go so low, so I head over there.  Of course, there is no path to the road, it is complete pricker bushes and brush.  I am stepping on some pricker bushes so I can try to get my body through, because I. WILL. GET. TO. THE. ROAD.  Meanwhile, here I come out of the woods, stepping over the guardrail of Baron Cameron.  I’m wondering who will drive by now and see me looking like a crazy person emerging from the woods.  I hobble across in between traffic to the other side, where again, all pricker bushes.  No path.  I could care less, I know I am .5 away from home.  Needless to say, I made it home, this was not my best look, and I cannot believe that happened.  I have zero idea why.  I am praying it was a fluke and will be going to chiropractor this week!

ALL THIS TO SAY:  hey, anyone wanna train for a marathon, haha?! Just joking, because I know this doesn’t want seem to sound like it is motivating.  It sounds horrid, and it was, but…..

 

At mile 13, I saw a friend on the trail who I am coaching for same race!  As we passed each other, I told her to “HAVE FUN!”  And then I thought for about 30 seconds, OMG, that probably was so stupid to say, this is so hard, and I acted like it was just easy and go have fun.  But I realized right then, that:  this really WAS FUN!  I had seen so many beautiful things during my time I was out yesterday- the amount of beautiful birds during these cold winter months is just awesome. I love their chirps, they are like little miracles, and some of the blue birds colors just AMAZE me!  And I saw so many pretty TREES- some with amazing white bark, and I went by a peaceful stream with rushing water.  It was so quiet, peaceful and serene.  And for so much of it, I felt actually okay- which reminded me that all of my work for the past 2 months has really paid off and gotten me stronger!  Even though the ending didn’t work out, I am stronger and more fit!  And… now I have a lifetime memory of the Saturday morning that I kneeled, crying, on the side of North Shore Drive in Reston, emerging minutes later from the woods and over a guard rail to cross Baron Cameron, nearly having to hop home in 32 degree weather.

I will end this now with one last bit of reminder to myself= it is much colder to finish the last mile or a run in this temperature NOT RUNNING!  By the time I entered my garage, I think my frozen fingers hurt just as much as my hip!

2^nd reminder to self….. maybe I should consider carrying a phone on long runs.

 

WEEKLY CLASS FOCUS

 

Planning a weeks series of classes, training sessions and workout plans is something I LOVE!

I love how it is truly a bit of science, some art, some sneak attack. 

When I plan a workout or class, I always ask myself a few questions:

1.       Is there a THEME- at the end of the class, do I want you to feel a certain overall feeling?  do we need to do really hard core, am I wanting for this to be equally balanced upper/lower body or should the focus be on one area a bit more, or how interval based- what energy systems am I wanting to make sure are challenged- is it a lot of short intervals with more recovery, or more steady work, maintaining constant effort throughout.  I ask these questions knowing what upcoming goals are coming, what we have done for the previous workout, what is needed etc.

2.       How can I create a really “good feeling” transition INTO the workout.  I am acutely aware that not everyone loves to workout as much as I do!  And even when we do- the WARM UP is one of the most important parts!  If it is too much too soon, you are dooming the entire workout.  If it doesn’t FEEL gradual, good and doable, mentally people start writing stories about themselves and the workout already within the first 60-90 seconds and decide they cannot do it that day.  I like to make sure we just begin moving, warming, flowing, no expectations, all good feelings, and then within a few minutes, it just is almost inspiring like, GOSH I already feel much better- this wasn’t as scary to begin as I thought!

3.       I also love to SNEAK things in.  For example- for yoga classes, every class, I always have a “strength sneak”- for example, I am thinking, I want to make sure we do some challenges for arm strength, or leg strength, or core.  Vice versa- for bootcamps, I am always thinking- how can I sneak some yoga in.  (so yes, each bootcamp class has some element of yoga in it- either a stretch or a dynamic movement which is “yoga based”.  Similar for personal training- if I am training someone who doesn’t also do yoga, well, they do some because I don’t “call it” yoga, but we do it😊

4.       Every class:   we:  do single leg exercises (balance, pelvic floor—ummm yes we need right?!),  we do lateral movement (instead of always front moving), we twist/rotate the spine, we pull the ribs in/shoulders back and down, we circle the arms, move the spine.  I cannot tell you that I GUARANTEE MOVING THIS WAY keeps your body so much healthier, resilient and ready for life.

 

 

 

So, I make sure to do all of these things and I know that I sometimes say the same words over and over…. “can you see your shoulders, pull them out of sight”,  “do you feel your spine wrapped front and back in strength”, “hear your exhale”… but I cannot tell you how much I want you to FEEL these things!  I Hope you do😊

When to "Call it"....

 

“When to call it”

So, I’m writing this at the end of a week of ughhhh.

I’ve been off- mentally, physically, energetically, the whole shebang.  I’ve tried to muster it up, put it back together, grasp onto any source of strength that I can to both keep myself going, but also provide for others- my family and also my work.  First clue this week was that I declared there wouldn’t be much for dinners.  I had zero to give.  We had oatmeal and smoothie, we scrapped together salad topped with any protein of choice, etc.  But I ended up not being able or WILLING to do that for my work.  I don’t want to give people an “oatmeal/smoothie” quality training session.  I had to cancel almost 2 days of work this week.

I struggle with this.  I struggle with what to do in times like this, because yes, it does happen to me.  I go to zero.  Zero ability to even have a full breath without huge effort it feels like.  And I sometimes think I can try to scrap by and patchwork myself into fullness to somehow still give a quality training session that I would like, but I realize I cannot do my full “thing” and I really don’t want to give LESS than what I feel like people deserve out of a workout with me. 

In a personal training session, I give my 100% attention, my 100% energy, 100% heart, 100% myself.  It isn’t just another session, it is THE ONLY THING to me.  Yes, my therapist has told me that I need to conserve my energy and not feel like I need to be the hardest worker- I shouldn’t be giving more energy than someone doing the actual work/exercise/training.  But, the reality is that I actually sometimes DO need to.  It is my job.  It is what I do, what I expect of myself, what should be expected of me, and sometimes that is the essence of being guided during a workout class or session to do MORE.  So, while I do need to be always aware of my energy output, what is necessary and riding that fine line, I recognize the value of being led to do more and that takes my energy, as it should. 

So, it is hard for me, when I realize I do not have it, to decide what to do.  When I do not have any MOJO to be intense- to move intense, to expect intense, to speak intense, to be IN IT FROM THE HEART, what do I do???  Do I give less?  And be okay with that?  Ewwww, that just doesn’t feel right, and that is not my standard.  I don’t want it to become my standard, I don’t want it to even become an experience.  I realize that sometimes people may actually WISH to have a workout experience with me where maybe my mojo is a little low😊, so I question, maybe that is good enough??

But, I cannot do it.  I do not want to.  I do not want that to be my thing.  I don’t want to be “good enough.”  I am passionate about the mental health benefits as well as physical benefits of exercise, and it means so much to me, that I cannot lower my standards to a level where I can fake it.  That is not me, I cannot do it, I want to be “all in” with knowing I am giving each person what they deserve for a workout.  I don’t want to risk less.

It's something I’ve learned along the way, after doing this for 22 years now (OMG)(seriously).  I go low with energy sometimes.  And what I have learned is, try to not fight it- accept that I Need to get still, get quiet for a day or two, let my heart have some slow beating, let my breathing come back, let my energy build, let my soul rejuvenate, and I can be my full self again.  Sometimes I question- is this fatigue? am I fighting something with my immune system? am I sick, is it allergies?  I am trying to learn the life lesson to stop telling myself stories about what it may be.  It is what it is.  I need energy, for whatever reason, let it be, and I come back.  I always apologize for having to “call it” and cancel, hate having to do that, but I would rather that than have to apologize for arriving not myself, not the full Sharon.

I’m always thankful that people seem to be more understanding of this than I find it easy to do for myself, thanks everyone…

SURPRISING OURSELVES!

 

There is nothing better than surprising ourselves… and AMAZING ourselves!

I have learned over 22 years of personal training and coaching that one of the most important parts of my job is how I speak.  I love what I do and you all know I am wildly passionate about health and fitness and performance, but I’ve had to really learn to “get over” the fact that I have to talk a lot, and my feedback is very often eye rolls, looks indicating I am crazy, shaking of the head, and very rarely smiles.  (disclaimer: I try to also add in humor, lightness and fun to any and every

 training session because if you have not smiled at one point in it, then I don’t feel good about myself as your trainer.  Simply put, part of fitness is long term consistency and you won’t stick with it if you are not smiling, laughing, having some level of fun and connection).   That being said, I think every person who has ever worked with me has literally thought at some point in our time together, “she is out of her mind.”  And that is okay with me that you have thought that, because that is MY JOB.

Right there:  it is part of my job, I said it.  Part of my job is to SHOW YOU WHAT YOU CAN DO!  Sometimes that is proving to you that you can do 100 pushups in a workout, 100 pushups in a row, that you can run a half marathon, that you can do epic workouts to get you to your goals, that you can train yourself to balance for 30 seconds on one foot, that you can run indoors on your treadmill for 10 miles when it is snow/icy outdoors.  I won’t list all of the fun exercises you may have done with me such as one arm squat thrust, side plank with hip taps and toe touches, all the things.  We move in different ways so that we are challenged, so that our body learns new ways of moving, so that maybe we spot muscle or side to side imbalances, and it keeps it NEW and FUN- there is never a reason to be bored in fitness, right?  But within all of these fun challenges, yes…. I know… there are times that you may not have thought what I was asking you to do was possible.

Which brings me to the importance of my speaking and communication.  I have learned how important it is to make sure I have a plan of “gentle entry” into hard things😊 when possible, and this is not just the physical entry into the movement, but trying to be nonstop with my cues so that one movement somehow just leads into the next with no breaks.  It is much harder for someone to try something if they have stopped their feet, stood and watched me and had time to make a face like “this is insane.”  At that point, I have more work cut out for me.  If I can be quick and smooth and try to make it SEEM like this is just the next OBVIOUS thing to do with our bodies, it can be so much better!  HA! Who knew that it isn’t all about science, physiology, metabolism and anatomy.  Sometimes it is how I can keep us in the moment, in the movement, nonstop.  An interesting thing I have noticed that zoom classes gives us is the “opportunity” to NOT be with each other and looking around finding someone else who also thinks the exercise is unfair!  When everyone is in their little squares on the screen, there is less likelihood of the class rebelling against me, haha!

One of my favorite parts of my job is when people do say after the fact, after the workout, “yea- I did not think I could get up that hill one more time, but I did.”  Sometimes, I have had to hold people accountable and not let them off the hook when they flat out tell me they cannot do something BEFORE THEY TRY.  Uhhh uhhhhh.  We do NOT do that ; we do not say that we cannot before we even try.  BECAUSE:  when we try, we FIND what is possible.

Just last week, someone wrote to me, “I think easing back into exercise is over. We are in it. I thought I was not going to make it through class but I did. During class you had us do a one arm push up and put the other arm up. I thought when you said what we were to do you were crazy there was no way I could do it but I went down and did it. Not pretty but was something a few years ago would have been impossible. So, thank you for that.”  (I save emails and notes and cards with things like this and it gets me through weeks of watching people roll their eyes at me!)

And I want you to know that this is not just me doling out challenges to you all.  When I sign up for a race and begin writing my own training plan for that race, one of the things I always ask myself is:  What are some workouts/ training sessions that I’m not sure if I can even do.  For example, if I want to run a marathon and qualify for Boston at my next marathon, what are some key critical run goals along the way that I need to hit, but am not even SURE if I can.  So, I also ask myself to do the (near) impossible.

IS IT NOT JUST FUNDAMENTALLY AMAZING that during our days, we get to do things that surprise ourselves and amaze ourselves!  That we get to FIND what we are capable of?  I remind people often, “I wouldn’t have you do it unless I knew you could.”  Admittedly, sometimes that isn’t the full truth- there are always workouts that maybe you actually CANNOT DO.  (ahem….. I had a long run goal last week that I could not do in terms of executing my pace plan).  However, for the most part, we are capable of so much that we don’t even KNOW that we are!

It's interesting how much we learn through exercise and one of those things is to trust ourselves.  That we can rely on ourselves to focus, to try, and to be OPEN and ADVENTUROUS to the spirit of the effort!  I don’t take it lightly that you all show up at training sessions or classes with me with an open mind.  I fully recognize that you have no idea (sometimes thankfully) of what I have planned.  But there you are, open to the “test of the day” that you may find within your workout.  You are open to working, trying and potentially doing things that you did not think you could do.  I think that is pretty cool.

 I truly think that is living fully, ALL IN. **think on it and email me 1-2 things that you have been AMAZED that you have been able to do that you didn’t think you could!